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Anti-social behaviour: Having ‘that’ conversation

Many people who experience anti-social behaviour at home will avoid speaking to the person(s) responsible. You might think ‘’the conversation is too awkward’’ or ‘’am I overreacting?’’ or ‘’it could make matters worse’’. 

While it can be daunting, talking about the issue in person is much more effective than a note through the door or even trying to ignore the issue until it causes you stress or anxiety. Always consider your safety and the safety of others before you make the decision to speak to someone.

When you approach the person(s) to discuss the issue remember these tips: 

  • Approach them with a conversational tone, rather than being bossy or assertive. For example ‘’Hi there, how are you? Do you have a minute to talk about…’’ is a better start than ‘’Excuse me you know you shouldn’t be doing that’’ 
  • Explain the impact their actions are having on you and others – Quite often people aren’t aware that their behaviour is effecting anyone else and this is enough to change their behaviour 
  • Try to keep the conversation as impersonal as you can – Focus on the actions and their impacts, not the individuals 
  • If you feel unsafe because the conversation has become aggressive or threatening, walk away 
  • Try to reach a verbal agreement about what changes will be made to fix the issue 
  • Thank them for speaking to you and encourage them to discuss any problems in future 

If you are experiencing anti-social behaviour of a more serious nature and you do not feel confident speaking to the person(s) responsible, please see our information on how to report anti-social behaviour.

Contact us - Community safety

01235 422590
(Text phone users add 18001 before dialing)

South Oxfordshire District Council
Abbey House
Abbey Close
Abingdon
OX14 3JE